The Paths We Follow
by coldfiredragon
Summary: Severus considers the downward cycle that is his life. Based to the song Voodoo by Godsmack, kinda dark most likely overrated COMPLETE


"The Paths We Follow"  
Written by Coldfiredragon

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, It is the properties of their individual creators. DON'T SUE ME I HAVE NOTHING BUT MY COMPUTER. I promise.

Summary: Severus considers the downward cycle that is his life.

The flicker of candlelight barely illuminated the dark room deep under the Riddle Manor. The bare room had been carved directly out of the stone and the room's single occupant could hear water dripping somewhere beyond the vaulted doors of the chamber.

Lord Voldemort steepled his fingers in front of his face as he leaned against the ice cold stone that formed his throne. He could sense them coming, his faithful few, his precious circle of death eaters. A small smile formed on the dark lord's face as he thought of those who had pledged themselves to him. /Like sheep led to the slaughter, they follow their shepherd with blind faith and trust. / Voldemort's smile broadened at that idea. / But in every heard there are those who rise above the rest. The black sheep of the flock in a certain sense. The one or two who are bright enough to lead. / Voldemort had to constantly remind himself that he had 2 such sheep within his faithful circle. Lucius Malfoy was the first with his self-assurance and pure-blood standing, and Severus Snape was the second with his quick intelligence and deadly emotional control. The dark lord's smile disappeared as the doors to his chamber opened to admit the earliest arrivals of his dark circle.

Severus Snape walked along the dark halls that lead to his lord's chamber. He was glad that his deatheater mask hid his features or one of his fellow deatheaters might have been able to read the emotions that played themselves out through his eyes. The young wizard was tired of the lie he was living. He wanted to be free of the pain, the fear, and the death that surrounded him but most of all he wanted to rid himself of the thrill that those things brought him. Severus turned the final corner and found the doors to the chamber only a few feet away. Immediately Severus pushed all his confusing emotions to the back of his mind and felt a feeling of desperate loyalty rise to take its' place. / I am a servant of my shepherd. I choose this path and I will continue on my lonely road to hell. / He slowly made his way to the door and grasped the gleaming silver handle.

The door opened easily and Severus entered the room. The flickering candles on the walls cast long contrasting shadows and a cold shiver worked its' way up his spine. The feeling was quickly followed by a sense of anticipation and exhilaration. Slowly the young wizard made his way through the gathered death eaters to take his place beside Lucius at the right hand of their lord. This was where he belonged, in a place of power. At least that was what he thought at the time.

The power was what he had always wanted. He was in control now, his dark lord had seen to that. Severus remembered the day Voldemort had accepted he and Lucius into his circle. The two of them had just graduated from Hogwart's and were eager to do something that would challenge and excite them. Voldemort had seen their potential and had agreed to accept them into his circle. They were by far the youngest to receive such a privilege. He remembered kneeling before Voldemort and pledging his loyalty before presenting his bare forearm. His lord has whispered the incantation and Severus had felt his blood freeze as the dark mark burned its' way into the flesh of his arm. For the shortest second he had felt panic grip him and he wanted to take it all back but it was too late. He pushed the feeling back down into the pit of his stomach and just barely regained his precious control before he cried out in pain. When Voldemort had finished claiming him it was Lucius' turn. Severus had watched the silver-haired noble kneel and recite his pledge of allegiance to his new lord and master. Now it was Lucius' turn to present his forearm to the dark lord for his final right of passage. Unlike Severus Lucius was unable to stop an obvious gasp of pain as the mark burned into his flesh before the blond collapsed gasping for breath. Even though he wanted to do something to help his best friend Severus simply stood aside and watched, forever proving himself the stronger of the two.

The meeting was over and Severus stood to leave with the rest. As he exited the chamber he felts the sense of fulfillment leaving him and the ache of uncertainty return. He made his way out of the Riddle Manor and to the edge of the apparition wards that protected it. From there he apparated to him home at Snape Manor. He shambled aimlessly through the house until he reached his study where he used his wand to light a fire in the hearth before collapsing on the couch. He wondered why he continued to heed his master's call even though it brought him so much pain. / It's where you belong. / A proverbial voice in his head whispered. Severus sighed, that was his devil, the embodiment of his dark mark some might say. He waited for the other voice, supposedly the angel to speak up as well. Instead the next voice he heard was the voice of reason. / Even if you did turn away you wouldn't escape. / Severus hated to agree but the voice of logic was right. He had pledged his life to Voldemort and there was nothing he could do to change the path he had chosen.

Severus didn't realize it but sometime during the early evening he fell asleep. He awoke well after midnight to find that the fire in the hearth had died to mere embers. / Much like my soul. / Severus thought bitterly. / I gave up my life when I pledged my loyalty to my master. I am nothing but a sheep that must blindly follow. / He stood and walked over to the glass doors that led to the balcony which overlooked the grounds. Slowly he pulled them open and walked out. He could see dark clouds gathering on the horizon, clouds that were heavy with rain. He could smell the coming storm, hell he could almost taste it. Severus griped the iron railing and looked up at the moon, noting in the process that it was full. / A moon full of hope which brings light to the darkness. / Severus cast another glance at the clouds. / The hope will be lost to the coming darkness. / He lowered his eyes to his hands to find them grasping the rail in a white-knuckled death grip. He didn't know how long he stood there staring at his hands and thinking about how he had ruined his life through the choices he had made. He didn't notice the tears streaking down, his face. He didn't notice anything until the first heavy drops of rain splashed down upon him. The wind suddenly picked up blowing is loose black robes around his thin frame. The rain continued, mixing with his tears and soaking his clothes until he was thoroughly drenched. Finally when the chill of the night air had completely set in Severus turned and walked back into the manor.

He made his way through the silent manor until he reached his private chambers. When he reached them he quickly changed out of his wet clothing, dropping it in a neat pile for one of the house elves to take away. It wasn't until he climbed into bed that he realized just how exhausted he really was. As always his sleep was troubled with dreams. He dreamed about the pain, fear and death that had been caused by his hands. Severus awoke in a cold sweat and pulled his knees to his chest. Tears blurred his vision as he tried to breathe and calm himself. He knew he had to change his life before it destroyed him and Severus knew of only one wizard who would even consider helping him. Severus got up and quickly dressed before making his way to his study. Once he reached it he quickly wrote a letter to Albus Dumbledore and whistled sharply. Within minutes his raven flew into the room and landed on his shoulder. After entrusting the letter to the bird he opened the window and sent the bird and the letter that would hopefully lead to his freedom off to Hogwarts.

Severus smiled to himself as he watched the bird disappear into the early morning light. For the first time since pledging his loyalty and life to Lord Voldemort Severus felt a ray of hope returning to his life. / Maybe I'm not a sheep after all. / He told himself.

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